Rose of a Gypsy

With rain followed by immediate bright sunlight we dose ourselves in doubt, feeling the cold rush of wind through the taught veins in our bodies. We push our skin closer together, wanting to feel each other pulse and breath but nothing more. If we felt more, if we had more what would we be at? Our confusion would spread and therefore create an unknowing situation, one that would be left alone and unsolved for far too long taunting at the back of our heads. That is why we do not go far.

Walking in the path of nature we begin to handmake the paper that make up the books of our lives, bound by uncertainty and random glorifying happiness. Here we stand, and here we sit. Sparkles fall down upon us as the pen begins to write, swiftly swaying back and forth, left and right between the pages that are quickly crumbling. We think we have enough time, to lay here and do what we will and not have to move. It is a lie, but we ignore it and waste our precious years in true bliss and ignorance. – the pages are now burning -.

Stare into the fire, try to find the symbolism behind it. Is there any? You sit there, striving to figure out what it truly means. And yet, it truly means nothing at all. There is not always symbolism in everything, there is not always hope in times of fear, there is not always love deep beneath the hate. Sometimes, there is just nothing at all.

*Shadow Soldier Unite* (Old)

Some kind of revolution is coming after the armageddon and during the propiganda of some corrupted government situated lie that destroy’s our lives and wails out a battle cry of sudden silence in the most curcial death of our thoughts that incases us all in the same society but different classes of honour and pride. This secrecy of mine is ewer solace in hell and the all eternal life. Kill me now before my eyes must bear this cold hard fate of the humanity of this world eye’m forced to reside on. There seems to be no escape but the many facade suicides of my daily life. Kill the screaming, kill the beast from within my black heart. Now time to wake…Up!!!

This world is the garbage can for wasted formalities, building up and feeling an immense decay. Some sweet sensation urges us to live on and to not dig the knife into the moonlight skin stretched across our wrists which hold our life-line. Learn to live with passion and forge those false laws that itch at the skin under our revealing garments. Ewe think ewe’re hiding all ewer secrets and wurds when we stare at ewe with scolding eyes, written in blood, and in pain, and in shame above ewer closed eyes that describe ever fetal self. Harm is scratched deeply into ewer thigh, where those lonely emo tears slide down onto. Eye hate the way ewe act, eye hate the way ewe look and feel about this world of ewers. My wings expand into enormous beasts that capture ewer lies and web ewe inside of them. Some feeble death of my suicidal self takes place before ewe and all ewe do is smile expectedly. Kiss these wicked lips one last time which have my victims blood tearing down from them. Eye am reborn, into something bigger and stronger. Along with the good lonlieness inside my heart because eye finally rid myself of ewe.

My mission is to seek and destroy ewer sanity as ewe did to mine. If ewe wish to save ewer soul from a weak anarchy let the spiders claw at ewer eyes and crawl into ewer mouth. Swallow, eat them ewe filthy sinner! God is a fraud that reigns power over the weak and intimidates the strong.

Shadow Soldiers. Heed my words for eye’m part of ewer species, we are ready for battle as deadly poets with a knife and a sadistic smile we shall slice ewe. There is no surrender, my species. For there are few of us out there! This time is our act of revenge. Eye am ewer one and ONLY messenger so there is no telling ewe twice. We must protect and invade with everything we have deep within ourselves. We are but mere worms to secretly crush them all. We are not their slaves even though they point and imprison us. They can no longer hurt us, as one the parasites shall suffer and the traitors will fall to their knees before us. Our weapons are words, our battle cry is our emotions and the spiders inside. For that ewer now walking away. We are cannibles. We shall eat ewe. Wait, it’s not over…Why are ewe walking away from our posession?

Before Work (Old)

Crush the pact, enable the deaths and create a new society in which you yourself rule as Queen and bridge a nice aquaintence with those you truly loath. Your life goal shines before me as bright as the stars up above as you title yourself high and all powerful even though I could make you shiver with my stare of hate. Some kind of knowing has dawned deep upon you, stepping on my hopes and dreams as you squash those everlasting biblical lies and take out those who do not follow you directly for you feed on the weak and the strong give you theirs. My life is probably less than that of a peasent to you, my voice is just an annoying squeak off in the distance as I hollow to the moon for my salvation and demand my freedom like so many before me yet I am one to never give up and I am one whom bottles with anger and hate yet nothing else. When I look at your Kingdom I see power and money along with high class society, but when I stare you into the eyes I see fear and so much doubt hidden behind a facade which you have even come to believe in. The only thing that anyone should believe in is in themselves and in doing so believing in their abilities to take the next person up down until a new society is built out of rebellions and criminals, theifs, murderers, rapists, everyone is far from innocent in that place where the dead roam freely about in daylight. It is the perfect society for those who wish to repent do so by staying in line since normality is death and blood and slaughter and the more gruesome things that have come to your mind. Imagine a little innocent girl walking home at night…(Fast forward)…four minutes later she lay dead on the pavement of a dark alleyway with her skull bashed in and her blood still seeping out of her even though her heart has stopped and her eyes lay open with fear even after she is gone and her soul is lost forever wondering in that place of hers where no one could hear her horrid screams that pushed violently out from her lungs as she kicked and pushed as the stronger being viciously took her life right from under her nose. That would happen in your society where rebellion is rape and bloody murder. Whereas in my perfect place it is normal to do so, and there is no such thing as cops so what will those rebellious bunch do then? So next time you think of the perfect society don’t think of some happy place with happy families everywhere, think of hell on earth with fires bringing down homes everyday and families torn apart by war and soldiers marching the streets because that is the only true perfect society if you really put your head to it.

The Root of All Evil (Old)

We are derived from one place in time, one being of supernatural existance, and yet we do not take the time to understand or to even know at the least. Twisting and turning, our eyes are shut closed as our hearts are left open to hurt and default. We lie in the safety of what tomorrow and today might bring but for some reason forget about the past and decide to never look back, but life seems to be a mystery to all of us and we ask why?! The answer is so simple, it is set right before us! And I will even GIVE you the answer today, right here and now. This feeble existance of ours means something so much more, we all have a purpose and some of the purposes may be invisible though but that does not mean we do not have one, even I admit that I have one. When nothing can save your life, and if you strive to keep it there are things that have happened in the past that will ressurect you or bring you new hope or just keep you out of harms way and make sure you do not fall into those deep withering pits of hell or the trimupth of those blinded by heaven. Sweet sensations quiver these thoughts, do they not? Think about what you are reading right now, think that it is a real person with feelings and a mind of her own writing these words – a person that has been through things that most of you have not. I’m sick and tired of looking ahead and praying that fate will stall just for me, I’ve been through so many pictures and seen so many memories flash before my eyes that by now I feel like I know every aspect of my life and can read when and what will happen. Sometimes that is always not a good thing, sometimes that will hurt us and strictly damage us even worse but there is always an upside and for some reason most people tend to forget about that. Why is it that men and women dwell on that which they fear, loath, and the things gone wrong or the things that could go wrong? There is always happiness in someone’s life no matter what, it may be a person, object, pet, book, movie…anything…but just remember that there is always something.

Movies, they always seem unrealistic but if you hear about something that has come from a movie you just automatically decide that it is false immediately because you are scared of what could actually happen and that nightmare’s really do come true and not just your dreams. Some Otherland is far off from our view, but those who can see it are the blind, disabled, deaf, mutes, and the ones that stereotypical people call “crazy” such as myself. If only you could see it, you would understand completely all of what I have written. Now I have written once or twice before about the Otherland, and I wish for all of you to see it as I do and as the others beside me do as well. It is so beautiful and I cannot wait to rest there for eternity but something seems wrong about that thought now – probably the fact that it is almost impossible to rest there without you because you cannot see it fully. But what if I took you there? Would you follow as I so dearly hope, or would you turn away with a snide smile on your face whispering about how everything would be alright? All of these questions run vividly through my head as I continuously revisit this place. Golden shadows creep across this vacant city, with towering buildings of most beautiful stature and eyes so soft and warm along with welcoming with not a crime in their minds. Sand covers the floor, in the middle of the desert where the sun always bakes my skin to a nice touch where I feel blanketed in love and comfort, like sitting in front of the fire with you on a cold day. Everything in Otherland is completely beautiful and especially golden, for some odd reason but it makes me feel right at home. All wars go on outside of the walls, nothing can touch us like some magical being is cupping us in his hand.

+All You Need Is Trust, And A Bit Of Pixie Dust!+

(( Follow Me To The Otherland, Where We Can Be Together Forever… ))

Death Blooms (Old)

A sweet sensational death blooms, just like the morning flowers with trickling dew drops falling from the edges of the leaves from the early spring-time. Memories begin to come forth into your mind, bringing back times which were never to be remembered and yet those things said that were never to be forgotten. When we were young, we learned things that would build up our youth and blossom us into something great and like a butterfly we would gracefully arise and make the world of tomorrow a simply better place, but something dark has taken over that since then. Failure grasped at our necks, choking us from ever breathing in the scent of day any longer and night made us blind as we sheilded our eyes from that which we did not want to see. Vast distances now emerse inside of us, creating a voiding wall of pitch black holes and milky ways creep into our eyes showing the spacious thoughts in which you indulge yourself inside of feeding off those whom are weaker.

Scratches upon my arm tell a story of the past, where the ride was long but oh so short and ended all the too soon. When I got to the finish, I never wanted to leave the place of hell which I loathed so much..loathed so much to love it. A sheet of white covers the ground perfectly, ice and all and it looks so beautiful and takes my breath away. Smirking to myself, the cold air comes through the small cracks of the window and nips at my neck almost playfully, or tauntingly. Either one it annoys me a bit, kind of negs at me. An itch forms in the back of my ear, the kind that you get from listening to your loud music too long and my headphones were still jammed deep inside of my ears so I could block out those about me. The few friends I had there that I could talk to, just did not seem exciting enough and I would rather indulge myself into deep thought and plan my day wistfully. Something urges deep within me, welling up and surging forward. Is it pain? Regret, anger and hate? Possibly even love! Could you imagine, someone as dark as me and as demanding…could you imagine me in love? Many don’t think so, but when you hear my voice booming loud in affectionate rhymes..you will understand that doomsday is near.

Locked Inside

(Will be posting many posts right now…from my other blogs – I am trying to collect them all so this is old stuff)

This room seems so much smaller when your not in it with me, cradling my thoughts and resting gently against my rushing emotions that act as a waterfall in the deep woods of isolation which patter gently with the rain trickling down from the leaves of the large tree tops just overheard of us. Illusions wrap vividly around our necks, strangling us with these facades which hold our true selves together and string up the dolls which we cling to for some reason in the middle of the night when death is the only thing that we can ever think about. To dream is to live…

Dreams:
They elevate our minds to set a goal sometimes, but I’m talking about when we shut our eyes and close down our intelligence statures and sign off to the world. Oh! the beautiful colours and sweet horizines of tomorrow and the smiles of today and the laughs of yesterday fill our sleepy ears and make us look each and every way about us even though all we see truly is black. Only good times can be found here, but I don’t have much to say on this subject because all I’ve ever dreamt is those sweet murders of my mind which is plagued with nightmares. Nightmares are ressurection of the wicked…

Nightmares:
Grasping ahold of you, taking over your body and covering you in a sheet of hate and lies and deception of which you can’t back your way out of. Agression, hurt, and pain bubbles from the pits of our stomachs and races up to our eyes revealing all which is hurtful. Wishing so hard for your plain touch which excites the soul, and takes my heart on an exhilerating dance I bleed internally waiting for all that you can or want to give to me. Something may be lost in this transaction, my life may run out sooner or later but still this time here and now may scare me truly but madly enough I dance wildly within this dark place of abadonment as tears stream down my cheeks. Screams fill my silent lungs which surround my unbeating heart which dies slowly from the outside in – - – if I keep walking forward I’d be treading deeper water and raping myself with this adrenaline rush which now fills my veins. So scared, alone, completely freaked out. Nothing can save me anymore as I have collapsed on the forests floor of this dashing nightmare which carasses my body harshly and moves me gently with its winds. Death seems to be my only thought, and leaving you is the only thing I’m scared of. But too bad, because here you have left me and left me no other choice but to bring it on faster and louder than before. Boom. Boom. Boom. The sounds of drums off in the distance startled me as I took in my deep last breath and breathed out your name in a cursed yell which you ignored * A cry for help across the distance, forgotten and unloved *. The last picture in my mind, is the image of you with her and laughing gently with each other about this horrid death of mine in this deep nightmare. When I awake, hot tears are all I feel because this nightmare – is only a prophecy of the truth.

Mysty Shadow Soldier #23 – Messenger Courtney Mistress Acaia
+ Save Me From My Nightmare +

Cheers

Here’s to life!

We all know we love it, don’t we? Sitting here day after day wondering when the toaster is going to finish, impatiently watching the television weather channel before we goto work – rush rush RUSH. It never ends, does it? Or does it – can it, can we? Humans were not built for boredom, and that is true. We make up situations of boredom, we set them up for ourselves – why? We know we hate being bored. As a race there is no longer any distance for us to run, we have ran it all and back around again so where are we to go from here? That’s it – it’s over and done with now, simply that is it.

You say you’re not addicted to anything? That’s a lie. If it’s not substances (Which I bet it is) than it must be a person.

So I say cheers! Cheers to life and hating this boring damned world so much. Cheers to you and your addictions. Cheers to everlasting human stupidity. Cheers and don’t forget to Kiss this Box.

Come Join Us

Here we go again…

Marching down the street, the louds howls in the night that you hear do not come from wolves lurking in your backyard but something alike all the same. Here are feet will march beneath the green, we shall be reckless and insanely indifferent to the pain we cause you because it is not half the pain that has been caused by you. What are we if you sit back and allow these conservatives to win us over, to win over this world and destroy what they will and replace it with what we won’t. We feed off of the weaknesses of the powerful, their downfalls will result in our uprising. Join us and you shall see. We are a cult. We are innocent lives turned against each other. We are protesters. We are activists. We are what we are. We are unstoppable. We are unable to die. We are you. We are me. We are everyone that opposses them.

We are right.

Favourite Quotes

“Maybe this world is another planet’s hell.”                                                                                            ~Aldous Huxley

“Go With The Flow”

“Sex, drugs, and insanity have always worked for me, but I wouldn’t recommend them for everyone”   ~Hunter S. Thompson

“It is better to be feared than to be loved.”

~And old quote but I first heard it in Anne Rice’s “The Vampire Chronicles” was one of Lestat’s everlasting quotes.

“We are here to make a better world. No amount of rationalization or blaming can preempt the moment of choice each of us brings to our situation here on this planet. The lesson of the ’60s is that people who cared enough to do right could change history. We didn’t end racism but we ended legal segregation. We ended the idea that you could send half-a-million soldiers around the world to fight a war that people do not support. We ended the idea that women are second-class citizens. We made the environment an issue that couldn’t be avoided. The big battles that we won cannot be reversed. We were young, self-righteous, reckless, hypocritical, brave, silly, headstrong and scared half to death. And We Were Right.”

~Abbie Hoffman

“You just get stoned, get the ideas in your head and just do ‘em. And don’t bullshit. That’s the thing about doin’ that geurrilla theatre. You be prepared to die to prove your point.”

~Abbie Hoffman

“”Smoking dope and hanging up Che’s picture is no more a commitment than drinking milk and collecting postage stamps. A revolution in consciousness is an empty high without a revolution in the distribution of power. We are not interested in the greening of Amerika except for the grass that will cover its grave.”

~ A.H

“Become an internationalist and learn to respect all life. Make war on machines, and in particular the sterile machines of corporate death and the robots that guard them.”

~A.H

“Hey, Hey, LBJ, how many kids did you kill today?”

~Anti-War Slogan

“You can kill a revolutionary but you can’t kill the revolution.”

~Fred Hampton

“Avoid all needle drugs. The only dope worth shooting is Richard Nixon.”

~A.H

“We must bear in mind that imperialism is a world system, the last stage of capitalism-and it must be defeated in a world confrontation. The strategic end of this struggle should be the destruction of imperialism. Our share, the responsibility of the exploited and underdeveloped of the world, is to eliminate the foundations of imperialism: our oppressed nations, from where they extract capital, raw materials, technicians, and cheap labor, and to which they export new capital-instruments of domination-arms and all kinds of articles, thus submerging us in an absolute dependence.”

~Che

“Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it’s cracked up to be. That’s why people are so cynical about it. . . . It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don’t risk anything, you risk even more.”

~Erica Jung

“The relationship between rock and revolution is granting that most musicians are a bunch of avaricious ass-sucking dogs, and most of the song writers (too), myself in many ways included. It’s the form or the intention, or the implications of the music that make it interesting to the revolutionary. It’s a tool and a tactic for getting children to revolt against the protoplasm that raised them and consider other forms of government, other forms of dealing with the situation. When you coordinate and liberate and release the sexuality and the minds of youth, and can twist it and change it toward a different goal and direction, via rock ‘n roll, via fucking in the streets, via dope, via action, direct action … then you can maybe push this country and we can rewrite the whole structure, based on the kind of energy released by rock ‘n roll.”

~Ed Saunders

“What luck for the rulers that men do not think.”
~Adolf Hitler

“I’ve always felt that animals are the purest spirits in the world. They don’t fake or hide their feelings, and they are the most loyal creatures on Earth. And somehow we humans think we’re smarter—what a joke.”
~Pink

Dish

To escape the poison of society, to walk beside you and just get lost. All these things, things – these possessions are clouding our minds and changing our strict moral codes. What is the use of it all anyway, we are all strange machines waiting to be decoded and rebooted after a slight ‘tweak’ just to fit perfectly into our cubicles. We learn and have little time for play even though our laughter fills our early years, and then we work only to learn some more. Life is the greatest learning experience, my question is that if this is true why do we have to be thrown into corrupt scholastic systems that just badger us to act the same. Schools that pretend they are hindering to our individuality but they are just preparing to size us up for those same damn cubicles. Certainly there must be a way to escape it all, fall out of the hoop.

There Is.

Whenever one is poisoned there is always a cure that can be found, and this is no exception. Though this can be heart wrenching, you must escape it all and never look back. Grab what you want and go for it, never thinking about the consequences or how this might look on you. If you believe you are in love but find somebody that makes you happier, immediately go for it and never look back. Life with no regrets and no thought to your actions is an unpoisoned one, one where they cannot touch you and cannot mold you. You are who you are only truly when you are running. It is just like breaking away.

Break Away.

I do it differently than most, I have done it many of times. Too many to count and it is driving me insane, and I cannot wait until I do it once more and with you. Something I have never done, because I usually find myself breaking away from people – not breaking away with them. We associate freedom with escape, when they are two different concepts. For some reason the road we are going on has many twists and turns but always ends up going the same way. As the thunderstorm rages in the background I listen carefully to the sound of your heartbeat which is literally miles away but yet here I am hearing it in the bass of my eardrum. No matter how much I say that I want to break away, I doubt I could without your help because I would never be able to watch my money and education burn. That is why you must hold the lighter. Only you could understand. Only you.

Only you.

I like you. Who can tell if this is love, if this is more than a silly little crush. No one really can. Does that matter, we like being together and we are free when we are lying in each others arms. That is why I want to be a leathertramp with you, so we can be free together and share it all together. Hunchback and with long tangled hair we would walk the world and once again, never look back. There is no way that hate could come our way as survival would be at the top of our list, and happiness would come down second. Happiness, it would be true, real and strong when we create a shelter and a fire and recreate it every few months. Energetically we would live day-by-day and become one with our surroundings, making music by the flames at night with our own rythm and tunes. Eventually we would return and be totally different, cut off and unable to be poisoned because we are already infected. We would have poisoned each other so deeply already. Never would we be alone, we would crash back and forth with the green sea. We would find what we would call truth and the real life.

Real Truth.

Is there any real truth in our existance? Money and power seem so real to us, but really it is an illusion and it is inside of our heads. We feel a deep connection with our nature, but for some reason us humans feel an even deeper one to this material world and I cannot wait to escape it. Too later, we have already been poisoned because we could poison each other. The truth that is truly true to us is false and has been since the very beginning, it has all been drilled into our heads and now there is no real truth. This society is totally sick, bending us and if they told us to believe that All Dressed Lays Chips were the truth, we would sit back and take it all for the truth. That is how vulnerable we are, that is how incapacitated we are. Truth to me is walking through the forests with a pink sky in the background and dark green beneath my feet and your hand in mine as we discuss the beauty of it all. Then it will all be redefined.

A New Beginning.

All of a sudden I feel as though I am running uphill, striking me hard into the chest. This is my new identity, my new life and the rapids are so rough that I laugh so as the feeling will not gorge me deeply. The universe is the playground for my new beginning, the universe is so joyful to have me here as well because it tells me so when I lay on its back. There is something more than rebelling, this is not what I was doing. I was born to be an adventurer, born to live by the means of the wind and the tides of the stars above me. I will open all these new doors in life and behind each one of them will be a greatful surprise, it will be something new every time. Imagine me being kept up in a cage, it would not make any sense, I am meant to be penniless and away from civilization – creating one of my own. It will involve only two people, the most primitive tools that our ancestors still create with their large hands, meat raw and burnt will coat our teeth and as will the splashes of berries which we have collected and hoped to not be poisonous. Yet, remember, there always will be a cure.